Extremely Loud and Incredibly Awkward: A Night Out In Tel Aviv

Here’s your Hebrew word of the day: Arsim.
Arsim are a large collection of Israeli men who watched a few episodes of “The Jersey Shore” and declared “this is how I will live my life.” They do things like wear hats made of all leather and Ed Hardy shirts and say uncomfortable things to women. Last night they were out in full force.

 (sorry random Arsim friend. I love you.)

As a people, I think they are incredibly amusing. We went to this bar last night and there were tables full of them, occasionally with women.  They are either staring at their phones, their drinks, or scouting women with serious squinted, eyes. And okay sometimes they are hitting on them… maybe more than your old pal Rick is. I tried my best okay? I just don’t have the confidence of a man wearing an all leather hat and a gold chain.

I don’t know the name of the club we went to last night but I do know that I am morally opposed to it more than anything else I’ve seen in Israel. A fifteen dollar covercharge is criminal and if the UN wants to regulate anything in Israel it should be this nonsense. Why am I paying you lots of money so I can have the privilege  of then buying your nine dollar beer? It’s like I can either buy someone a drink or have money or have a savings account.

I should mention that the night was fun: everyone was in good spirits and the Arsim did not talk to me because I do not have the parts they are looking for.

But I will say that if someone came up and said “Hey Rick, we are having a protest so Palestinean families can build over those bars and create a string of places with reasonably priced drinks and no cover: want to join?” I would immediately renounce my zionism and run to the front lines.

I’m glad I went once though. It’s a life experience to slick back the hair and go clubbing in Tel Aviv, and I’m sure I’ll go again. I just have to remember to sell a kidney or two so I can buy a rum and coke.

On a more serious note, I’m in the process of making plans to cover a story in the West Bank. Obviously I am a little scared but I am thrilled it can happen. I’ll give out more details in a few days.